Why won't my boss help with my burnout?
- Claire Baker
- Oct 17
- 2 min read
Ever been so overwhelmed that you start every conversation with a recap of how busy you are?
You’re trying to say, “I’m drowning.” But the person in the boat responds, “Oh great! Since you’re already down there, can you...”
When you’re burned out, it’s a reasonable instinct to broadcast your capacity. You’re trying to say, “Help me get out of this mess,” without seeming uncooperative or needy.
And if we’re being honest, you’re probably also flexing a little. Showing how much you’re doing so someone will be impressed with your martyrdom. You’ve been working so hard, it’s reasonable to expect recognition.
You’re hoping they’ll pitch in. Instead, they pile on “just one more thing.” It’s not that people don’t care, they just don’t know what to do about it. And the job still needs to get done.
I've been there. Believe me.
The freedom doesn’t come until you realize that no one is coming to save you, and you decide yourself what tasks to jettison.
Here’s where I'd start:
💡 Switch your “hustle” mindset into deciding what you’re going to let slip through.
Ever think about how many emails never get a response, and no one even notices? If that’s true, then maybe responsiveness ≠ performance.
If you let go of the idea that you have to respond quickly to every message, you can filter messages by what actually moves the work forward. If you don’t have what’s needed yet, it can wait.
💡 Instead of broadcasting your capacity, set expectations.
Instead of telling people you’re too busy to fulfill their request (then finding a way to do it anyway), tell them what you can do.
If it’ll take longer than they thought, tell them when you can do it by. If you can’t do it at all or they need it sooner, tell them how to get it done without you.
💡 Keep the conversation focused on priorities, not personal limits.
Framing around priorities protects your energy and keeps the focus on outcomes rather than state of mind. It also makes it easier for others to make trade-offs with you instead of around you.
And if the deeper truth is that the job’s pace is fundamentally unsustainable for you long-term, practicing these habits now still helps. It’ll give you a clearer picture of what “manageable” looks like when you have a constructive conversation with your boss.
...Or search for your next thing.
Hi, I'm Claire. I've been there and lived to tell about it. Listen to my story in our HR Peep Show episode on Burnout:
If you're struggling and don't know where to turn, I'm happy to talk. I'm not a career coach, but I'm here to lend an ear and possibly connect you to someone who can help. You're not alone.
Drop me a DM on LinkedIn telling me about your struggles and I'll send you my scheduling link. No charge. It's lonely out there. Sometimes you just need to talk.
Comments